“It is cheap to pardon than to resent. Forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred.”

HANNAH MORE

Have you ever been so pissed with someone to the extent that you resolve not to talk to them again? Maybe they said something hurtful or did something that broke your trust. You said you forgave them but you just don’t talk to them anymore . . .
Well, this was me a couple of months ago. Someone said and did a lot of hurtful things to me.
I was very hurt and angry but I knew better than to not forgive them. So, I forgave them (or so I thought). I resolved in my heart not to talk to them though.
Everytime I saw them, I didn’t even say Hi. Everytime I saw them, my heart skipped a beat. Everytime I saw them, I remembered everything that played out when they hurt me and got angry all over again . . .

If you have ever been in my shoes, you will agree with me that these are all things that happen when you are holding a grudge against someone.

A grudge is a persistent feeling of ill will or resentment resulting from a past insult or injury.
Now that you know what a grudge is, let me tell you how it all ended. ..

The Holy Spirit nudged my heart several times. He kept insisting that I should forgive them but in my defense, I would say “I have forgiven them. I mean, we’re cool, I’m not just talking to them.”
I narrated all that transpired to my Mom and elder Brother. I actually wanted someone to back me up in my resolution but guess what? They did the direct opposite!

They told me I was still harboring anger and bitterness in my heart. This was taking me down Unforgiveness street. The devil was more than excited about this since he had gotten tools to work with.

To cut the long story short, they talked sense into my head and told me to truly forgive the person who had hurt me. I was to talk to them like nothing ever happened, take things back to how they were before it all happened. I was still to tread with caution though to avoid it repeating itself.

Did you notice that Scripture said ‘all that you can‘ ? This means that there are times it might be hard and seemingly impossible to live at peace. Especially when you want to live at peace with them but they don’t want to in return.

You might ask, “what do I do when this is the case?” The Scripture below gives us insight to what to do. Be good to them (though it can be hard) regardless of whether they respond immediately or not (Rom.12:21).

Forgiving someone that hurt you is really not about the other person. It is about what it does to you. It sets you free. You begin to have peace of mind. You find out that it is not so hard to greet them anymore even if they don’t act nicely to you.

To forgive is to let go of a grudge or an offence. Unforgiveness will in turn mean not letting go of a grudge or an offence. It entails harbouring anger, hurt and hatred towards the person who offended you. This is not GOD’s will for you. He commanded us to forgive those who hurt us (Mark 11:25-26, Matt. 18:21-22).

We forgive others because Christ forgave us. Not necessarily only to receive His forgiveness. He forgave us despite our sins and wrongs.

Was it hard for me to forgive? Yes! It was very hard for me but GOD helped me do it anyway. He is ready to help you too if you let Him.

GOD wants you to forgive that person. Yes! That person who hurt you really bad. Don’t hold back. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you let go of the hurt and forgive them.

I know you have been inspired. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to make the decision to forgive? How did you go about it? I will like to know and feel free to share a story if you want. Please share this post with as many people as you can too.

You can also check out this article by Joyce Meyer on practical steps to forgiveness. Click here.

I’ll be in the comment section.