‘Show me your friend and I’ll tell you who you are‘. We’ve all heard this saying a thousand and one times.
Just before you roll your eyes and give your ‘heard that, don’t need that‘ look, please stay with me for the next 3 mins. Will you?
When I was much younger, my parents (mom especially) always hammered on the fact that I needed to keep good company. I remember when we went for an August convention in church and got to meet this amazing family. They had 3 pretty girls and one of them was my age or so I thought. We played and bonded to the point that I almost shed tears when it was time to leave. I kept on telling my family that I missed my friend. My parents laughed and mom said, ‘You don’t make friends like that. ‘
Younger me thought my parents were being mean or harsh but there’s truth in it. Choosing your friends is not something you do hurriedly. You don’t choose your friends because they are good-looking, have got cash or have that British accent you love to hear. Choosing friends should be done wisely.
I’ll like to share some tips I believe will guide you in choosing your circle.
How to choose my circle?
- Pray about it : Yes! You can never pray too much or pray about situations too much. It’s how you get to know God’s opinion concerning a matter. Tell God to lead you into the right friendships. Ask Him for guidance.
Trust in and rely confidently on the Lord with all your heart And do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know and acknowledge and recognize Him, And He will make your paths straight and smooth [removing obstacles that block your way].
Proverbs 3:5-6 AMP
- Check if your values and goals are alike: this is as important as Oxygen is to Man. You have to have similar values and goals. This will aid your fulfilling purpose in life. When two people are moving in the same or similar direction, it makes everything easier.
Where no wise guidance is, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.
Proverbs 11:14 AMPC
- Bring your Faith into it : you should be of the same Faith and beliefs to avoid inconsistencies of any kind. Amos. 3:3 shows us that two can only walk together if they agree.
Do not be unequally bound together with unbelievers [do not make mismatched alliances with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership can righteousness have with lawlessness? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
2 Corinthians 6:14 AMP
These are ways I use in choosing my circle. Being in the right circle of friends helps you grow. They don’t necessarily have to teach you but by merely living their lives, they impact yours positively.
After choosing your circle, you have to grow it. I mean, do you plant Hibiscus flower in your garden, not water it and expect it to grow? Of course not.
P. S : All ye farmers, agriculture students and florists, please don’t come at me with all the possibilities. I’m just trying to get you to see this clearly. LOL!
You get my point right?
You have to add the spice, fertilizers, growth sprout agents and every other thing that aids growth to your friendship.
You may be wondering, “What are these spices she speaks of?” They are:
- Communicate often
- Spend time together doing the things you mutually love
- Trust each other
- Pray and Study Scriptures together
- Challenge each other to be better versions of yourself.
- Be ready to learn from each other.
- Be accountable to each other.
P. S: If not for accountability, you probably won’t be reading this now. LOL!
These are just 7 of the many ways to grow your circle. I know you know some others so please, let me know in the comment section.
Conclusion
Before I say goodbye, I’ll like to debunk the misconception that your circle has to consist of people your age. In Jesus’ circle, we see Peter, James, John, Mary Magdalene and the other disciples. I bet they weren’t all age mates. In my circle, I’m probably only the same age as one person. Others are older than I am.
What I am trying to say is, it is not enough to have a circle of people you grow with. You have to grow that circle too and I hope this blog post has inspired you on how to go about it.
How did you choose your circle? How do you grow it too?
Please leave me your responses in the comment section as I always love to hear from you. Don’t forget to share with as many people as you can too.
Gloryinspires 